Ezra's Bright Idea
A contest!
Everybody loves a contest, do they not?
"Think you've got what it takes to be published in the Western Standard?
(E.d. subtext...If the National Post, the Globe and Mail, and the Calgary Sun or the local fishwrap free daily won't pay you for your literary output... don't fret!)
"Now's your chance to prove it - and to win some serious prize money!
Now... despite what I may think of Ezra, money is always a good incentive to get the literary juices flowing. Maybe this isn't such a bad idea. How much cash is Ezra going to pony up, I wonder.
Announcing the first annual Western Standard Editorial Contest, with four ways to win:
* Best Opinion Editorial
* Best News Story
* Best Art Work
* Readers' Choice - judged by a vote on the Free Dominion website!
Ok...
so... uh...what's the catch, Ezra?
"First prize in each category is $1,000 - and having your work published in the Western Standard! Second prize is a Western Standard gift pack, including a Libranos t-shirt, poster and a copy of the War on Fun - and having your work published on the Western Standard's website. Third prize winners will receive an honourable mention. And all entrants receive a free subscription to the Western Standard. If you're already a subscriber, use your free year to extend your current subscription or send a gift subscription to a friend!"
Why is it that when I read the above, I am having flashbacks to late-night TV commercials urging me to... DRAW THIS PIRATE!
I know this is simply too good to be true.
There's just gotta be a catch somewhere...
Well...
Ah...
There it is.
Atta Boy Ezra! You never fail to disapoint!
2. You may enter as many times as you like, in one or more categories. The entry fee is $50 for each entry. Each entry entitles the contestant to an additional free subscription.
Wow.
Well...
I will say one thing for ol' Ezra.
He's got cajones the size of Texas.
8. The Western Standard reserves the right to cancel this contest and refund entry fees if there is a lack of participation (which we don't think will happen!)
Let's just do the math. I assume that Ezra is banking on the fact that he will get at least 80 conservative minded people from across Canada to enter his contest. This would mean that he would break even on having to pay out the $4000.00 prize for all of the above mentioned catagories.
Are there really 80 Conservative Canadians who would be stupid enough to pay for the chance of letting Ezra judge their literary output and then decide whether it should appear either in the print edition of the Western Standard, or indeed, even on it's website? (E.d. Is that really how Ezra managed to get all those wingnut bloggers to contribute to the Shotgun? Are they paying him? Well... that would make sense based on the usual fare available at the odious group-blog.)
But...getting back to the contest. Are there perhaps even a few such individuals out there who would use the "enter as often as you wish" clause, and waste $100 on a double entry? I suppose it is possible that there might be 40 or so *really* stupid conservatives whose ferverant desire it is, to grace the pages of "The Western Standard" with their own by-line, even if they are only "Pundit-For-A-Day"
But somehow, I doubt it.
I have to wonder about what will happen when this "literary contest" falls flat, and fails to produce any revenue, if Ezra might be inclined to try some new advertising more apropos of his publication and credentials as an editor/journalist.
Well, in case he's reading,I've got some suggestions for him...

Or even

Or Why Not...

Because the way I see it, even if AntFarms, and "X-Ray Glasses That Amaze Your Friends", and Sea-Monkies are an obvious rip-off, you at least get something when you send away for them...instead of gratifying the narcissistic whimsy of hack magazine publisher/editor Ezra Levant, which is in fact, your only reward for entering this "contest".
I will also say this: If this "contest/subscription drive" actually works, I think Robert McLelland should forevermore be exempt from criticism for his continual hectoring of the Western Standard contributors as "a bunch of stupid rubes".
Anybody who would pay money to enter a contest such as this, is by definition a rube, in every sense of the word.





PRETTY PLATFORMS. Were Tory supporters hoping to use Enza “Supermodel” Anderson to embarrass the Canadian Alliance? Photo by PETER NOGALO.